“Welcome to the mystery, romance, and adventure of Trader Sam’s Grog Grotto. Here on the shores of paradise, our seafaring friend established this happy hideaway for all to enjoy!” 

Aside from proudly boasting his offer of TWO of his heads for one of yours, everyone’s favorite Head Salesman from the beloved Jungle Cruise attraction — Trader Sam — has one more bragging right to add to his list: Trader Sam’s Grog Grotto is #OnTheList this week!

Of course, this isn’t Trader Sam’s first “happy hideaway.” He also has a nice, cozy spot reserved at the Disneyland Hotel, known as Trader Sam’s Enchanted Tiki Bar. It appears he ran out of room on the west coast, because Sam has tucked more memorabilia, souvenirs, and artifacts from his global travels into just about every inch of this over-the-top lounge in his new space in Disney’s Polynesian Village Resort.

Does it look small to you? Indeed, it is. While it looks like the 4-hour-plus wait times it was known for in its opening days are a thing of the past, getting in (especially on weekends or peak seasons) can still result in a wait, thanks to the immense popularity of the spot, and the snug 51-person capacity.

We’re still not sure whether or not the gigantic Cephalopod counts towards the seating numbers…

YEP… that’s a Cephalopod tipping that there bottle of rum. You see, Trader Sam has added more than a few nods to 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea to his east coast spot.

And Jungle Cruise fans will no doubt want to take a look (or two… or five — there’s LOTS to see!) around the room to take in all the kitschy, jungle-y details.

You can order food in the Grog Grotto (I recommend the Corn-Battered Portuguese Sausages and the Salmon Oshizushi), but by and large, it’s better known for drinks for several reasons: first, the cocktails you can order here are unique to the Grog Grotto and its counterpart outdoor Tiki Terrace (as opposed to the standard menu you’ll find across most Disney bars and lounges). Additionally, some of them come in collectable and coveted souvenir glasses (including a $52 Nautilus), and THAT’S where the fun really begins…

Because the final thing that lands Trader Sam’s Grog Grotto squarely #OnTheList is the interaction not only of the wacky and wonderful Skippers (Cast Members) with the guests, but also the room itself.

The ordering of certain drinks sets off a chain reaction in and around the bar. Let’s take, for instance, the Polynesian Pearl.

If you request this blend of RumChata, Grand Marnier, cinnamon, and tropical juices, the Skippers find themselves digging for the “pearls” in… well, I guess you just need to see her.  Allow me to introduce you to… Shell-y.

Of course, you can’t see the drink within the Pearl, so you’ll just have to trust me that this sweet and creamy beverage goes down smooth (and fast!), even with the bit of zest that comes from the cinnamon.

The tasty RumChata overwhelms the juices in this one, though, so if you’re looking for something with a little more tropical flair, you may want to try what’s up next…

Krakatoa Punch is Sailor Jerry Spiced Rum, Pyrat XO Reserve Rum, Orgeat, Sam’s Gorilla Grog (passion fruit, guava, pineapple, orange, and lemon juices all mixed with falernum, which is a sweet/spicy syrup reminiscent of cinnamon, cloves, and other sweet spices), and hibiscus grenadine…

… all served up in a glowing cup — hot lava, of course.

And speaking of hot lava, when your Krakatoa Punch arrives, here’s a fair warning: the Krakatoa Volcano goes from peaceful, serene, and dormant…

… to an angry eruption!

But nothing gets quite as angry as the Tiki goddess of disaster herself, Uh-Oa.

In fact, she has a drink named after her.

The Uh-Oa! is made of Myers’s Original Dark Rum, Bacardi Superior Rum, orange, passion fruit, guava, pineapple, and grapefruit juices, falernum, cinnamon, and fresh lime juice. And it’s ready to serve two or more in this souvenir bowl surrounded by See-no-Evil, Hear-no-Evil, and Speak-no-Evil Tikis. (Yours to take home for the low, low price of $40 😉 ).

Can you spot the cinnamon on their heads? When I received my Uh-Oa amidst the chants of “Uh-Oa! Uh-Oa! Uh-Oa, Oa, Oa!” led by the Skippers, it was aflame. Tossing the cinnamon into the fire makes it spark…

And this REALLY gets her goat!

If you like your drinks served with a side of hijinks, shenanigans, tomfoolery, and general ballyhoo (with a HUGE side of Disney nostalgia, to boot!), you’ve simply GOT to put Trader Sam’s Grog Grotto #OnTheList!

Which drink would you like to order at Trader Sam’s Grog Grotto? Please let us know with a comment!